The Road So Far
by Amberdreams
Summary: <html><head></head>E/O Drabble Challenge which was for a 1000 words using these 10 prompts - in the order used: stale, suspension, nefarious, impish, contrite, blue, laugh, pencil, tongue, sunshine. Warnings: Occasional use of the F word. Summary: Pre season and nine seasons – the Winchesters have weathered many storms. A drabble vignette for each season</html>


**The Road So Far**

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><p><strong>EO Drabble Challenge**: word count 1000

**Challenge words**: This challenge was for 1000 words using these 10 prompt words - in the order used: stale, suspension, nefarious, impish, contrite, blue, laugh, pencil, tongue, sunshine

**Warnings**: Occasional use of the F word.

**Summary:** Pre season and nine seasons – the Winchesters have weathered many storms. A drabble vignette for each season.

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><p><strong>1. The beginning.<strong>

He has no idea why he drinks to forget, because it never works. No matter how much alcohol he chugs, however dreadful he feels in the morning when he wakes – it's all there in glorious Technicolor. Every mistake he's made, every hurt he's doled out, every harsh word, every man and monster he's killed, and every stupid fucking thing he's ever done.

Every smile Mary gave him, every kiss; the anguish in her eyes when he looked up to see her burning on the ceiling.

Nothing grows stale; it's fresher than the green of Dean's eyes.

John remembers it all.

**2. Season 1**

Winchesters don't have the luxury of suspended disbelief. Dean knows anything is possible, as long as it's evil. Dean can't understand how Sam seems to have forgotten this. He thinks it's a good thing he's reminding his little brother of the horrors that lurk in the dark. He doesn't expect, in spite of everything, to have to patch up Sam's heart when something wicked gets too close to home.

That wasn't supposed to happen, not again. Not when Sam was out of the game.

Sam sleeps fitfully, after Jess, and in his dreams he mutters _fire, come walk with me_.

**3. Season 2**

Dad's words are heavy, squeezing Dean's heart. It's not just the fear that haunts him, it's fear weighed down by Dad's death, his sacrifice. Dean should have died twice over now, and two men have given their lives so that he can be here - driving his Baby along the empty roads of the mid West, next to his little brother.

Sam. The one constant in his life, his charge, his job. His family.

Dean sings loudly, drinks, eats and pretends. He's good at it, the best.

Sam worries about the Yellow Eyed Demon's nefarious purpose, Dean worries about Sam.

**4. Season 3**

Sam doesn't find the Trickster's absurdity impish, in fact, he doesn't see the funny side at all. The Trickster wonders whether the younger Winchester actually has a sense of humour, then he shrugs and clicks his fingers to reset the clock one more time. He'd thought the tacos were particularly inspired, but Sam really isn't getting the point, so – rinse and repeat.

Later, he realises his mistake. It was he who learned a lesson from the Winchesters, about the love that drives two humans to such extremes.

Some things are worth dying for.

Dean's afraid, but goes to Hell anyway.

**5. Season 4**

Castiel sees Dean Winchester's soul. It gleams pure and bright, in spite of everything the man endured, so Castiel can't understand how Dean can't see that he's worthy. Yet contrition drives Dean's every thought, every action. His shame for past sins overwhelms him, and Castiel feels responsible. It is his mark Dean bears on his shoulder, his actions that are pushing this fragile man into impossible situations.

"I can't do it, I'm not strong enough, find somebody else…"

Castiel wants to lift the burden, but he has to believe in a higher purpose.

They are all betrayed in the end.

**6. Season 5**

Lucifer rises and for a brief moment, he sees his intended vessel and is pleased. It's comely, strong, full of passion. Lucifer feels the heat of those emotions for a microsecond before that warmth is snatched away.

Lucifer burns cold, always has. His nature is all glacial blues, but that doesn't mean he can't appreciate the fire that burns inside Sam.

There's no room for self-doubt, so when Sam says yes, Lucifer's certain nothing but triumph will follow. Michael's resistance will fail. His brother will kneel, or die at his feet.

Instead Lucifer falls, and it's Dean who's left kneeling.

**7. Season 6**

Sam tries to understand, he really does. But living with Dean is like walking in a minefield. Or visiting a foreign country where all the customs are different and you haven't been assimilated yet. In as far as he wants anything – apart from food and sex and cable television in their motel rooms – Sam wants Dean to be happy with him.

So it's especially difficult to work out what he's doing wrong, when apparently he laughs at totally inappropriate times.

Soul or not, Dean getting smacked in the nose by a tiny naked fairy has to be funny. Right?

**8. Season 7**

Sam's mind is like a pencil sketch a child has scribbled over; it makes no sense any more. He tries to rub out the lines and start again, but there's been too much pressure used, everything is dark and smudged and suddenly he's being crumpled into a ball and thrown away.

In this confused tangle of black, white and grey, Dean is his only anchor. Pain is second best. Sam clings to sanity with bloody fingernails while they try to bring down the Roman Empire for a second time.

This time the sacrifice is unplanned and that's what shatters Sam.

**9. Season 8**

Heads turned to the sky, they watch in horrified wonder as the angels fall, a bright shower of meteorites against the sky. Even now, sitting side by side, Sam feels a distance between them. He bites his tongue to stop a scream escaping.

_Let it go, brother. _

But how can he let go when Dean won't release _him_? He can feel the fever raging, as the energy of the uncompleted trials sizzles through his veins with nowhere to go.

Sam thinks about the beauty of Bobby's soul as it curled up into the night, and wonders how it would feel.

**10. Season 9**

Crowley is cunning, sharp as the skean dhu he used to keep down his stocking when he was human. He's playing 3D chess while his opponents bumble around a snakes and ladders board.

Dean is both dead and a demon, and that's fine and dandy. Best laid plans coming to fruition at last, and not a moment too soon. Who'd have thought a squirrel would make such a good attack dog? Crowley listens to his dog howling at the moon – sorry, singing – and smiles.

And if he quietly whistles along to _Walking on Sunshine_, that's between him and the night.


End file.
